This post is dedicated to all my silent readers… I hope you start commenting soon 😉 lol
I swirled up some cheesecake, mixed berry and granadilla flavoured Wakaberry and sprinkled on some pecan nuts and a huge dose of milky bar syrup before waiting for Ayaaz, Zaydaan and Humaira to weigh it all up. After supper, we took a walk and then opted for some Wakaberry before it was time to head home.
Humaira sat close to Ayaaz and offered her a taste of her bubble-gum flavoured frozen yoghurt. He seemed quite comfortable with her. I couldn’t help but wonder if there was something going on between them…
“Reez”, Zaydaan called, snapping me out of my thoughts.
“Huh, yea?” I responded slightly flustered.
“Where are you lost?” He asked laughing at me.
“Sorry, just thinking, ” I said, smiling a full smile at him.
He smiled back and we all joined in a general conversation, laughing and joking.
I pulled him to me and hugged him once more.
“Bye Zayy,” I told him smiling at him. It’s a bittersweet moment as I’m happy to see him but sad to say bye to him.
“Bye angel, talk to you soon,” he said to me.
Ayaaz and Humaira said their goodbyes too and soon enough, Ayaaz and I were back on our way home.
“Thanks Ayaaz,” I said to him, smiling.
“It was my pleasure… Did everything go well?” He asked.
“Yea…” I said and then trailed off.
“That doesn’t sound very convincing,” he questioned laughing lightly.
“He asked me to be his girlfriend…” I said and then I kept quiet waiting for a response from him.
“Oh…” He replied. “So what did you say?”
“I told him I’ll think about it…” I said softly.
“So what are you thinking?” He asked.
“I just don’t want to get hurt again… I’ve always liked Zaydaan but I’m scared…”
Ayaaz put his left hand over mine while his right hand remained on the steering wheel.
“Don’t worry. I’m here whatever your decision is. Just choose whatever makes you happy.” He said as he smiled at me and I held onto his hand.
“Thanks,” I said. “It means a lot.”
“Well, you can’t get rid of me no matter what!” He said and we both laughed. We stay in silence for a few minutes before I speak.
“So, you and Humaira huh?” I asked him.
“Haha no no it’s not like that… We’re just friends, really.” He said.
“But you guys seem quite close…”
“Yea we were when we were on campus together. She’s great but she’s just awesome to hang out with, nothing else.” He said. “Actually, that’s partially because of me, I’m not a very committing person.”
“So you won’t commit to anyone?” I asked him questioningly.
“It’s not that I won’t commit. I just don’t want to commit to someone until I know she’s worth it.” He said.
“Hmm okay, makes sense I guess.” I said, thinking about it. “But how do you ever know that she’s worth it?”
“That’s the thing, you don’t… You just have to take the risk. But before you do that, you need to think, is it worth it?” He said as he looked at me.
His words rung in my head as I thought about taking a risk with Zaydaan.
I wished Ayaaz goodnight when he dropped me off and after a great night, I went into bed thinking about Zaydaan and I.
We were great together. He was always special to me and we had this connection that I couldn’t explain. He is sweet and caring and he pays attention. He listens to me and makes me smile when I need him the most. He understands me and I can talk to him about anything.
But is all of this really worth the risk? The risk of me getting hurt again. The risk of my family finding out. I don’t need it to be easy, I just need it to be worth it.
I thought long and hard while I lay in bed. Eventually I fell asleep and forgot all about it, about Zaydaan, while I dreamt of sunshine and rainbows. Ironically, life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows.
I woke up for Sunday morning breakfast. Pancakes, chocolate syrup and bananas and strawberries on the side. I love fruit and I love pancakes, so fruit and pancakes were perfect! Moe ate with me before he headed off to a car show in Kyalami with Ahmed and Zak.
Sumz came over just after breakfast. Uncle Hussain and Aunty Rukaya were gone to Makro for groceries so instead of staying home alone, she came to chill with me.
“Soooo, spill! How was last night?” She asked me excitingly.
I laughed at her and filled her in on all that happened.
“He looked so hot in his white shirt!!!” I told as I held the sides of my face in shock. “I think I melted on the inside.”
Sumz laughed at me, “I don’t know what it is with you and white shirts.”
“We had supper at Spur as planned. Ayaaz booked two tables, one for me and Zayy and another for him and Humaira. It’s his old campus friend.”
“Oh nice! So how was Zaydaan?” She asked.
“He was great. He was amazing. We laughed and joked and spoke about general things…” I trailed off.
“What are you hiding from me?” She asked curiously.
“Well…” I bit my lip nervously. “He asked me to be his girlfriend…” I told her as I looked at her nervously.
“He what???” She screamed in shock.
“Ssshhhhh!!! Keep it down woman!” I shouted her as I laughed at her reaction.
“OMG!!! Jeez, way to go all out Zaydaan!” She said still in shock.
I laughed at her response again.
“Yea so that’s what happened…” I said.
“So what did you say?” She asked questioningly.
“I told him I’ll think about it. We were done with supper and Ayaaz was coming over so I just brushed him off. And I actually do need to think about it. I don’t know if he’s what I really want.” I told her, confessing.
“Hmmm, tough call… I can’t tell you what to do or what to say. But I ca tell you, just follow your heart Reez.” She told me as she smiled at me.
We headed downstairs and sat with my mum for a while before Sumz parents came over after shopping at Makro. We decided to go for coffee so Sumz, Aunty Rukaya, my mum and I went to Mc Donald’s for the Mc Café.
“Two hot chocolates with cream for us and get us sugared donuts.” My mum told Sumz and I as we stood in the line to order and they went to get a table.
We ordered their stuff and two mocha frappés for Sumz and I and chocolate mud pies to eat. The frappés were cold and refreshing for the heat November offered and we enjoyed it in the company of each other. Sitting and relaxing with family is something you just cannot replace.
Sumz randomly poked me while we were eating.
“Hey, don’t poke me!” I said to her as I rubbed my side that she poked.
Aunty Rukaya and my mum started laughing hysterically. Aunty Rukaya said, “When your husband wants to give you a poke are you going to say hey, don’t poke me?”
Sumz and I just looked at them with straight faces.
“I have no words…” I told them before Sumz and I started laughing too.
My mum and Aunty Rukaya turn everything possible into something sexual. Don’t ask me why, they just do. So we were kind of used to it but no matter how much you do it, you can never really get used to it when it comes from your mother’s mouth.
After lots more sexual statements and many laughs we headed home and prepared for supper. Some of my other cousins came for supper too and we enjoyed a yummy meal of steak and vegetables before we all relaxed on the couch.
In the back of my mind I thought about Zaydaan. If my family finds out about him, I’ll lose all of this. The understanding, love and closeness that we have. They’ll think everything I ever said was a lie and they won’t trust me ever again. Once again I was baffled with the thought, is it really worth the risk?
After everyone left, I retreated to my room and sat on my bed. Moe came and chilled with me as he showed me his new games on his Samsung S6 Edge. He got a free game pad with the phone so he was quite amused.
After some terrible attempts at Real Racing 3, I gave up and gave it back to him before I smashed any more cars or drove on gravel again. He went to his room and I went onto the balcony.
I pulled out my iPhone and searched for his dimpled smile. Zaydaan.
I called him and he answered after a few rings.
“Heyy angel” he answered.
“Heyy sugar, how are you?”
“I’m good thanks and you? What you up to?” He said lovingly.
“I’m good, just sitting on the balcony…” I said to him. “I called to tell you something…”
“Hmmm, I’m listening?” He said.
“I thought about what you asked me…” I said nervously.
I thought long and hard about Reez on Sunday. I wanted her to be my girlfriend but I couldn’t force her to give me an answer last night.
She said she has to think about it and I know the thought of me hurting her again crossed her mind. I don’t blame her, I hurt her before. But I have no intention of doing it again.
This time, I just wanted her to be by my side. Someone to call mine. I want it to be Reez because I might love her, I want to take care of her and I want to be loved back.
I waited all day for something from her, some clue or some hint. Hell, even just a message from her would make me happy. But I got nothing…
I was in my room playing on my Xbox when she called. I paused my game and spoke to her, hoping she would tell me what she’s thinking.
“I thought about what you asked me…” She said into the phone. I could hear her nervousness as her voice shook a little.
“Okay, what will it be?” I asked her, equally nervous.
I heard a smile through the phone as she said “Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend!”
I let out a breath that I didn’t even realize I was holding and I smiled.
“I’m so glad you gave me another chance Reez, I promise you won’t regret it!” I told her excitedly.
I was happy to finally have another chance at fixing what I ruined… Us.
I spoke to Reez for a little while longer, elated from her acceptance. I really couldn’t be happier.
I wished her goodnight and the sweetest dreams before kissing her through the phone and hopping into bed myself. And for the first time in a long time, I slept with a smile on my face as I dreamt about Reez… Her beautiful smile, her gorgeous eyes, her warm hugs and her acceptance of me…
Those of you that hate Zaydaan, please don’t hate me for making her say yes… Lol!
On the contrary, did you enjoy the post?? Let me know 😀
Pictures for today’s post are below!
Until next time…